Contradictions

I have been thinking a lot about contradictions.

We are living in a time when society fuels polarity, when our politics and behavior and words and ideas are pitted against each other in a binary. And the binary is so good at lying to us, telling us there are only two options and that to believe one is true is to immediately denounce the other as false. Binary thinking is pervasive. I hear it in my conversations and interactions, in my thoughts and judgments.

I also witness and feel fluidity, as I non-binary my identity and queer my relationships. My body knows patterns that my brain cannot rationalize or categorize. So many contradictions existing within one body.

Contradictions are full of tension.

I think this is particularly true when we are trying to find a resolution amongst the contradictions, or trying to choose the one statement or belief that is true.

Contradictions are full of tension because they teach us to simultaneously hold multiple truths. And this is hard to do.

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I learned a contradiction practice through generative somatics that I often come back to when I am working to increase my capacity to hold complexity, to hold contradiction.

I start by naming a contradiction

the unknown is terrifying and freeing

And than generate statements for each contraction

the unknown is uncertain

living within the known is safe, predictable

relying on what is known is comfort and data driven

my intuition can charter the unknown

my intuition cannot be quantified

trusting my intuition is living wildly

For two minutes I say all of these statements out loud, in random order. And notice the sensations that come up in the body.

pressure in my chest, eyes frozen, rigid torso, I take a breath. space opens in my front body, there is presence at my back body, like my head is being held, my eyes focus on the landscape out the window

Holding contradictions overwhelms me. Awes me. Loosens me where I am tight. Expands me.

It is not about choosing one of these statements to be true because honestly, they’re all true. Instead, this practice invites me to hold these truths about about the known and unknown, about freedom and intuition, all at the same time, and just feel what that is like.

***

Hold your contradictions. What do you notice?